I'm totally sick of my life. Sick of my attitude. Sick of the way i behave. Sick of my thinkings. Sick of what is happening to me. Sick of the way people treat me. Sick of no freedom. Sick of EVERYTHING. I find life meangless. It's like i'm living because i am born into this world. When i want to die i have the thinking that i should see what is going to happen tomorrow. Cause life is full of surprises. And mostly i hate the way people treat me. Can't they treat me better? Just no one know what am i thinking and what i really feel. I am trying to change. But i just could'nt. There's always something that stop me from changing. It's just one thing. I am mentally tired of everything that is happening to me.
I told tracy what joey wrote on her blog. Yea, I am the one that told tracy that. I just wanted tracy to know how much joey treasured the Sistership. But instead of that, she flare up. And i knew that things are going to get worse. It really did. Maths was damn difficult. Miss Latha gave us three questions and the three questions i all dunno how to do. During recess Alexandra , Xueying and Tracy teached me how to do the maths:) Thx! So many people never do D&T. Lol. Lazy to find pictures larhs. Art lesson Tracy gave out our new Ez-link card. OMFG. It was p6 picture and i suck in it. I WANT MY OLD EZ-LINK BACK LARH! After school Tracy wanted to talk to joey about what she wrote in her blog. Went to daryll's block and eat sweet. Xueying help tracy to tok to joey. Joey keep on crying sia. She took 30 minutes just to answer one question. Tracy was damn angry larhs. In the end all our time wasted by joey manx. Went back to school for NAPFA test at 2.40. Wesly wanted to meet me. Lol. My NAPFA score sucks larhs. I did damn badly. I failed my Standing board jump. The others i passed. I think. Tao wei so siao larhs. His Incline pull up-50, Sit up-62, Sit and reach- 50+, Shutter run 9 seconds and Standing boared jump Almost 3 meter there. Siao lorhs.
After NAPFA went to meet wesly with Xueying,Tracy, Liyang and alexandra. He sniffing glue. Lol. This is the first time that i know people sniff glue in the soft drink can. He is like damn bloody high larhs. Then later Mdm armit and Mr Woo arrived at the park for checks. Lol. They went to blocks and check also. Liyang wanted to buy drink so we followed him. Slacked outside the shop for a while then i asked wesley to come and meet us. He come awhile when he walk away tht time i recieved a sms from wei qi. Knn. I was boiling then i shouted "CB KNN. SIBEI GUAI LAN". I threw my phone on the table. Then Tracy and Xueying took my phone and see the sms. Xueying used Liyang phone and cor Weiqi to talk. Tracy cannot stand it then she asked weiqi where is she and joey. They still in school so we walked back to school. Agn Xueying settle. Joey was crying agn. Weiqi keep on saying this line "FORGIVE AND FORGET" she said it more than 20 times. Went home after that. I was thinking about sth and i suddenly realised that i disowned more than 10 gans. Now i left two gans. Maybe i disown all of them.
I really had no idea what i am going to do in life. Drop out of school? I really don't know. There's nothing leading me to which path i should go to. I'm like a balloon flying in the sky, not knowing where i'll fly to. I've fallen and there's no one to pick me up. I'm like a shooting star, not as pretty as it,bringing disaster to the place i land on and affect people there. I just need someone to really guide me, bring me to the place that i truely belong. To a place where there are no sadness, no worries and fright. That person is the one that holds the key to my heart. He shall open it when he realise the key in his hands. Right now, it's invisible to him and he dosen't know anything about it. I'll wait for that day to come. Hoping it will not be too late too late.
